Bedtime

Children need sleep to grow and for brain development.  Sleep deprivation can lead to days of tantrums and grumpy kids.  When kids get the rest they need, they will perform better in school and at home.  But, how can we assure that our children are getting the amount of sleep they need when we struggle getting them to bed?

 Bedtime can become a frightful time of day for families with little ones who want to burn the midnight oil.  It seems that children have a great talent of prolonging the inevitable, but there is a way to combat that skill.  Parents who establish nighttime routines have better success at getting their children to bed at an acceptable time. 

Setting up a nighttime routine is simple.  A good nighttime routine will be established with the child’s involvement.  Allow your child to assist you in planning the routine.  They will be excited to follow “their” plan when it is complete.  Of course, as a parent, you must guide the process or it may end up with steps like:  eat ice cream, watch one more television episode, or skip the bath.  Help your child make wise decisions about his/her health by choosing appropriate steps for a nighttime routine. 

A good routine might be as follows:

1-            10 minute warning

2-           Clean up toys and turn off television

3-           Bath time

4-           Pajama time

5-           Brush teeth

6-           Get a drink of water

7-           Potty

8-          Story time

9-           Hugs and kisses

10-   Lights out

11-      Catch some “ZZZZs”

It is okay to offer a healthy snack before bed as well, but preferably early in the evening.  You can choose to add this to your nighttime routine as well.

By establishing a routine, you will notice that your children are having fewer incidents of staying up too late and, in return, your children and you will get much more rest.

Be sure to encourage your child to fall asleep on his/her own.  Give them a stuffed animal or doll to hug and assure them that you will check in on them.  It can be difficult for some children to make a transition from having parent presence for bedtime to sleeping on their own, but with your encouragement and assurance they will eventually feel secure enough to fall asleep on their own.

With a routine in place and with the child feeling safe and loved, bedtime will become a much smoother event.

Consequences for Choices

     When we make choices as adults, we know that there are consequences for those choices.  This concept should be taught to our children as well.  As they grow up, they must be aware that there are consequences for the choices they make. 

     Take examples such as, stealing, anger management, disobedience, safety, and health.  These topics can be discussed with your children and questions can be asked about what might happen if a good or bad choice is made.  Explain to your children that every choice has a consequence whether good or bad.  It is important for children to realize that they have power over their circumstances by making good choices. 

     I remember my son had a teacher in elementary school who had as her main rule for her class to "make good choices."  I love the idea of teaching our kids about good choices at an early age!  This rule has stuck with me, and I keep it as a rule in my home and classroom.

     

     Try helping your child to understand this concept now and they will learn to reflect on their decisions to bring about success in school, in relationships, and as they grow into young men and women.

Sibling Rivalry

In searching for a topic for a new blog post, I came across a question regarding sibling rivalry; and this made me start to reflect on my practices as a parent with my two children.  It seems that anytime there is more than one child, there will be some amount of fighting and disagreement.  How do we curb that? 

Well, I find that helping them to work through their problems during these disagreements is helpful.  I never take sides, but instead ask them to reflect on what the other is feeling.  This usually will bring the disagreement into discussion and eventually to a peaceful end.  Of course, my children are older, but this can work on most children if it is presented at their level. 

Make sure that your children understand that violence is NEVER okay and to NEVER allow anger to drive their judgments.  We can also model this in our own behavior. 

Another important part of reducing sibling rivalry is to try to stay neutral.  Taking sides can become a painful experience for a child.  Support both children and allow them to understand that you love them both and that they each have valid opinions. 

Take time to spend with each child.  Doing this can give your child a sense of love and relationship and will curb the desire to rival their sibling.

Sibling rivalry will always be an issue in parenting.  Although in following these steps and keeping positive and supportive, it can be controlled.

SUMMER SAFETY

     The hot summer days are upon us and it is so exciting to take the kids out into the warm sunshine to play and interact.  But it is important to remember that there are safety issues we have to follow.  Don't forget the sunscreen, keep a close eye on children when water is present, and protect your family from food poisoning at the family picnic.

     It is easy to forget the sunscreen at home, but within a few minutes a happy baby can become a very upset and badly burned child.  Make sure to carry a small container of sunscreen with you in the diaper bag or a purse, just in case you find yourself and your family outside with the sun burning down on you.  Carrying an extra container can assist you in avoiding a trip to the doctor or to the E.R. due to severe sunburn.

     Water, although a refreshing and fun activity, can turn ugly if children are not properly monitored.  Do not allow children to be unsupervised when around water.  A infant or toddler can drown in a mere foot of water.  Even a bucket filled with water can be a hazard to a mobile infant.  Keep a close eye on your children!  Sometimes when exploring a creek, you may become distracted.  Avoid distractions and instead involve your little ones in the activity you are doing by the water.  This way you can avoid accidents and allow an opportunity to bond.

     Food poisoning occurs quite frequently over the summer months.  Food is left out at parties and picnics when the temperature is perfect for food to spoil quickly.  What was good an hour ago, could cause days of stomach pain and even a trip to the doctor.  Be sure to put all food away as soon as possible after the family has eaten.  This will help keep your whole family healthy and protect the food you worked so hard to prepare from spoiling.

     Keeping these things in mind will help make your summer accident free and fun!  Now, go out and enjoy the summertime activities, before the snow starts falling!

Anger

Anger can sometimes become the cause of some distorted and disturbing family experiences.  It is important to talk about anger and how to express anger with your children.  Some children, and adults, find themselves resorting to physical harm to others, self, or to items around them. 

The Nurturing Parenting Program suggests that children be taught how to express anger in appropriate ways.  This can be done by starting with a simple discussion about anger.  Ask questions about what "anger" means, about a time when your child got angry, and about how they express anger.  Talk about scenarios in which a child might get angry.  Ask them what they would do in each of those situations.  Try to guide them into making good decisions on how to express their anger.  It's okay to get angry, but we all need to know how to express anger in a positive way.  Teach your children to use their "personal power" in a positive way (Bavolek, 2007).  There are three rules in expressing anger that the Nurturing Parenting Program suggests, and they are:

1.  No hurting touch or criticism to others.

2.  No hurting touch or criticism to yourself.

3.  No hurting touch to the environment.  (Bavolek, 2007)

After discussing these rules with your children, teach them how to be angry without causing harm to others, self, or the environment.  They can show anger in facial expressions and in an "angry dance" but not by breaking the three rules of anger expression (Bavolek, 2007).

Reference:

Bavolek, S.   (2007).  Nurturing Skills For Families.  Family Development Resources, Inc., p10.

Tooth Brushing

Have any of you questioned how to brush your young child's teeth?  Well, I remember questioning my doctors when my children were small on this subject.  No matter what age your child is, it is important to keep his or her mouth clean and healthy.  Use a damp cloth to clean your infants gums until they are old enough to use children's toothpaste (approximately 3-4).  Here is a great resource from Parenting on how to keep your child's teeth clean and promote good dental hygiene.

http://www.parenting.com/article/an-age-by-age-guide-to-toothbrushing

Family Time

One of the most important things you can do for your kids is plan time together.  It does not have to be activities that are expensive and break the bank.  There are lots of things you can do with the family that are inexpensive.  Family game night is a popular activity that does not cost a thing.  You can also plan a meal together and let the kids help.  And, craft activities from household items are always a hit.

With summer just around the corner, my mind keeps drifting to dreams of a beach vacation with the family.  For many of us that might not be possible; so why not have a beach-fun day at home. 

Break out the baby pool, buy a small bag of sand, gather some scoops from the kitchen for sand play, put on the swimming suits, and don't forget the sunscreen and towels.  You can even hide a few seashells in the sand if you have any lying around the house and let the kids look for shells.  If you don't have shells, try hiding pebbles.  Don't forget a little lemonade, and you will be all set for a cheap day of beach fun with the kids. 

I did this activity with my family frequently when the kids were smaller and they loved it just as much as going to the beach.  As long as they can play in the sand and interact with mom and dad, kids are happy and satisfied.